From L to R; the Sister M, arwah Kak Ni, me, the Mother & arwah Abang Yi
Today marks the 21st year of my arwah Sister's demise
I still remember the morning when her body was brought home from the hospital after 3 days being admitted for diarrhea. I just woke up, took my towel & was heading to the bathroom when I saw her bag. I was excited, thinking that she was home & I no longer had to skip my tadika to visit her at the hospital. I opened & explored her brown bag (still remember the pattern & design), thinking that there might be some candies for me, like she always got for me everytime she was home from the hostel
I found nothing & was a bit disappointed
Ma then came & hugged me. Sobbing, she said "Kak Ni tak dok doh..." & we cried together
The rest of the day passed by so fast. But I got to witness the whole process from mandi, kafan until her body was buried. I was just a small kid yet I could already feel the loss. Like a void hole. Like losing something precious irreplaceable. Like no matter how much I miss her & wish her presence to soothe me like she used to do, she won't be there. She couldn't & wouldn't
It's been a long time since I had a dream about her. I wish I've more pictures of us together but nope, just a few. Until now, I'll still cry myself to sleep when I miss her heaps :')
Al-fatihah to my darling sister, arwah Mahraini Muhammad (1977-1993). I pray may Allah reunite all of us again in Jannah. Amin...